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People Hear Your Character

People hear your character as well as see it.

Make no mistake, people are watching us all the time. They take note of how we react in certain circumstances and they remember when we do well as well as when we “lose it.” In other words, people hear your character as well as see it.

What comes out of our mouths is every bit as important as how we conduct ourselves, maybe even more so because words can either sooth, bite or lend clarity, but they are usually always remembered if we choose to make them memorable.

During a trying time others are influenced not only by how we behave but they also listen, and usually fairly closely, to what we say. Some of us are more reserved in our behaviors, some are more outgoing and demonstrative, but all of us eventually speak something. And what we say, how we say it and the tone with which we speak greatly influences others.

One of my favorite books likens the tongue to a rudder on a ship, and how we use that rudder stronglycharacters determines how we present ourselves and will leave an impression. Compared to the overall size of an ocean liner, the rudder has amazing power and influence, as do our words. And one thing about words that we speak to others, they are rarely forgotten by the hearer. People may say they don’t remember, but if we speak deliberately and not casually they rarely forget.

One of the most difficult if not the most difficult of our members to control is the tongue. How many times do we “run off at the mouth,” and greatly wish we hadn’t done so later? How many times have we wished we had have said something uplifting or clarifying? And how many times have we regretted not lending solid advice or counsel to someone who needed it? We’ve all been in all those situations.

I know that I can tell when I’m in a situation or conversation where my emotions are getting ready to take over simply by how I start to feel. Emotions can play a wonderful part in directing us to good and useful behaviors and words. When we feel strongly about a subject and we try to engage our brains along with our will, desires and emotions, we can usually get our point across correctly with some degree of proper articulation. Others may not see or agree with out point of view, but at least we’ve presented it in a manner that isn’t likely to “draw blood.”

speak wisdomBut when we, like the stain remover is advertised, just Shout It Out, we’re very likely to put off people, the very people that we would like to have at least consider our point of view.

I have been quite pleased and sometimes fascinated by how, like the old adage says, ‘A soft answer turns away wrath,” and many times quite surprised by how a person with whom I was engaged, later comes back to talk the matter out even more. That’s practical success in action.

Of course there are times when a subject is clearly black or white and in which conviction is not open for change. There are certain moral subjects that are clear. However, even in those clearly defined subjects a different tactic, phraseology and tone might still assist the conversation in staying on course and not get into “personality fights.” And yes, there are still times when yes or no and the reasoning behind those words must be adamantly corroborated.

Most of the time our words define us in others’ minds as much, if not more than our behaviors. People, though they may disagree, like to talk with someone level-headed and on target. And people can tell when someone’s character is showing through and not just their emotions.

One this is for sure and that’s that we all have to talk with people and the tone, temper, mood and gravity of the subject matter will constantly change. It’s best to leave another at least with something sensible to ponder and consider.

Words can be light or they can be dark, however one thing is for sure, the words we use will always be our choice and no one else’s. We get mad, upset or angry because we choose to.

It’s incumbent on us to choose our words wisely, because people hear our character as well as see it in action whether we think they do or not.


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